My mind wanders around and around like this until I feel just as bitter as I should, being blind and all, and I stomp upstairs to start on the seemingly insurmountable task of writing, addressing and sending ten or so Christmas cards.

First I compile and print out the address labels. I have to go back to good old WordPerfect for DOS to do this, as I've never quite mastered label printing from anything Windows has to offer. But still, after I've got over the Windows jitters , which involve pressing alt-tab, control-v and shift-down a lot, despite the fact that they have no discernable use, I quite like the fluffy electric-blanket that is MS-DOS.

Then I unpack the new Christmas cards. I buy new cards each year, even though there are always lots left over from the last, but I am perhaps a little teensy bit paranoid about sending someone the same card two years running. This year, I worked out that I was up to 9 boxes of cards to choose from and decided to make a little note of which cards I sent to whom, so that I could avoid building on the card mountain next year.

Then it comes to the crunch - I have to finish the foreplay and actually write the damn cards. Now, as I was a rather less than averagely sighted child, it wasn't thought appropriate to teach me to write properly and, consequently, I am rather self-conscious about my writing. I never quite seem to have mastered Ws properly, which immediately leads to problems with, "best wishes", "new year", "William" and "Warren". But I grit my teeth and squiggle. Then the real fun starts. I start to write, "To Ann…" when I realise I just can't remember if she has an e or not. So I'm running downstairs, 22-times magnifier in hand, to see how she spelt it on her card to me. Of course, I can never really tell for sure, what with other people's writing being so much more inventive than my own, but it shortens the odds on my being wrong. Having secured the information I need, I run back upstairs and finish the card, and squint intensely at the address labels to find the right one.

This goes on and on. Some people I know better than others and, of course, I wouldn't want to appear over-familiar with them, so I'm off downstairs again to see how they signed off their card, (after all, it'd be awful for them to think I have "lots of love" for them when they only have a "from" for me.) Finally, I stick on the stamps, assuming I've had the foresight to buy some, and post them, usually no sooner than 21^st. Then I sit and watch lots of telly, in the relief that the whole thing is over for another year.